I’m a pretty reasonable person. Work 9-5, pay my taxes, stop at red lights…but I can also be a psychotic bitch, especially when another woman is in the picture.
“Why is your best friend a GIRL?”
I posed this question to a guy I was dating. I hadn’t met her; to say I was threatened is the understatement of the year.
“We’ve known each other since high school…I used to date her sister and she’s like my little sister…she’s like one of the guys, she loves to just hang out with us and get stoned, watch sports, go camping…” That’s when he happened to notice that one of my talons was uncomfortably close to his ballsack. Stepping backwards into the dog’s food bowl, he hurriedly continued: “And I’m totally not attracted to her, she’s so not my type.”
Yeah, right, my insanely-jealous inner Carrie says. We’ll see about that. I don’t care if you’ve been best friends since you were fetuses and have gotten shitfaced 80 million times together without so much action as a handshake. Sex is always lurking in the background, rubbing its greasy palms together in anticipation.
Someone’s attracted to someone, and I’m about to find out if it’s her or him. Continue Reading…