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Women With Merely Grapefruit-Sized Breasts Need Not Apply
One of the best things about running this here blog, besides those moments when I sneak my head on to Ariel’s chair right before she...
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Scatalogical Trauma Is the Shit
When I was at work the other day, I walked into the ladies loo and immediately gagged – either a large animal had recently died...
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The Little Victories That I Take Pride In
Look, despite my happy-go-lucky, slap-happy Irishman looks, I’m a miserable, cantankerous bastard. I’d like to blame the drinking or the women or the cold hard...
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Tits and Ask: It’s Not Me, It’s You. Really.
DEAR KEN & ARIEL: Is there a right way and a wrong way to break up with someone? I’ve been dating this guy for about...
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Strung Out on Dick
Sweet Jesus, Help us Laydeez who get strung out on dick. It’s never pretty, is it. We start off all cool and independent, like Kate...
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Much Love to the Spitters AND the Swallowers
I was out drinking with some female friends this weekend. Of course, as it always does when I’m buying, the subject turned to blowjobs. And...
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Elope. Thank You.
You want me to be your bridesmaid? Wow, that’s…great. No really, what an honor. Let me open several new lines of credit for the following:...
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Tits ‘n’ Ask: When Boobs Go Viral
Dear Ken & Ariel: At what point in the online relationship is it okay to send racy pictures? KEN SAYS: I think you’ve already answered...
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Banging Your Coworkers: Never a Good Idea.
It’s the question that every man and woman will ask themselves at one time in their lives: Can I bang my co-worker and not live...
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Speaking of Quickies…
The fine folks at MetAnotherFrog featured me and my twisted mind in their latest Quickie. Do visit their frighteningly good site to learn the three...
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Respect the Ass: An Interview with Gia Nova
Imagine Rob Zombie performing Cirque du Soleil, but Rob Zombie as an impossibly hot blonde with a perfect hourglass body and an ass so round it almost violates building...
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