At Last, a Reason to Watch the Olympics

Hi.

Honestly, I had very little interest in the 2012 Olympics. Until I read this story about Australian gold medal swimmer Stephanie Rice, who came under fire after tweeting photos of herself in the swimsuit pictured above.

The people complaining about this suit? Obviously Communists who wouldn’t know a good time if it sat on their face. As far as I’m concerned, after seeing this photo, I now have a reason to want to watch the Olympics. And I think this is an important message to share with the Powers That Be behind the games. Want more guys to tune in? Allow more swimsuits like the one in that photo. Even better, get the long-distance runners out of those track get-ups and into this other number Rice tweeted herself wearing:

As good a reason as any to break the law.

If this photo alone doesn’t earn Rice another gold medal, I may consider moving to Jupiter. In fact, her entire medal defense should just be distributing 8×10 copies of this photo to the judging panel.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I may need a little “alone time.”

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