Please, Please, Please: No Yoga Pants for Men

sprocketsdance

Word on the street is that Lululemon, the company to which I already owe a debt of gratitude for their “too sheer” yoga pants, is planning to open some mens-only stores in 2016.

If the goal is to sell sweats and baggy-ass pants and the types of clothes guys typically work out in, I guess it makes sense.

But if this is part of a movement to eventually get guys into the same type of form-fitting yoga pants that women wear, then you, Lululemon, will become my sworn enemy.

Never mind the comfort of the small fraction of men who actually do yoga. Think of the disservice you’re doing to the larger legions of men who love seeing women in yoga pants and don’t need to see dudes in similarly tight pants muddying up the landscape.

In fact, instead of wasting any more time on mens’ yoga pants, might I suggest that you dedicate more resources to finding more ways to get more women into yoga pants. Ways that might possibly include a yoga pants-firing cannon that can literally blast a pair onto a female derriere up to 50 feet away.

Er, I might have the blueprints for such a device. Give me a call.

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