Respect the Ass: An Interview with Lexi Love

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First, in the interest of full disclosure, while I was dialing Lexi Love’s number to conduct the following interview, all I could think about was her ass. In the days leading up to the call, I probably watched 24 solid hours of footage of her bodacious, pert and insanely round derriere bouncing off the faces and schlongs of some of the world’s luckiest dudes. Needless to say, when we finally connected, it was difficult to focus on the voice on the phone rather than the spectacular ass it was connected to.

As it turns out, I came for the ass, but stayed for the charm. Lexi Love is, without question, one of the funniest, coolest and perhaps most down-to-earth porn stars I’ve ever had the pleasure of chatting with. Just think of her as the hot cheerleader chick you lusted over in high school, minus the attitude and with boatloads of quirky coolness.

And, yeah, there’s that ass. I’d be lying if I said that throughout our call I wasn’t tempted to just stop the interview, profess my lust, and ask her to run off to the Caribbean where I’d build us a hut out of tree branches and she could spend her days facesitting me within an inch of my life. But, as the song goes, some things are better left unsaid.

Folks, this is Lexi Love. Respect the ass!

It’s gotta be awesome when your publicist contacts you and says some guy wants to interview you about your ass.
Actually, it is. And I was trying to find a bunch of photos of my ass to send you, so you caused me to start an entirely new folder just called “ass.”

I think your ass deserves its own folder! I’m surprised you didn’t already have one.
Well I do now. So I’m all set.

Excellent. Now we can talk about your ass. I wish I could tell you I had loftier, perhaps more educational goals in mind. But I really just want to talk about your ass.
Fine with me. Why not? People talk about my ass anyway. I get random emails about my ass. I have guys on the street yelling, “Yo, damn girl, you got a black girl’s ass.” So it’s all good.

Is that one of the hazards of your line of work? That people you don’t even know — nerds like me included — just want to come up to you and talk about your ass?
Since I’m a porn star, I think sometimes people just assume I want them to touch my ass. And when I meet them at, say, a convention, they’ll ask, “Can I touch your ass?” And if I say no, they’ll point to someone else and say, “Well she let me touch her ass.” And I’ll just say, “That’s nice.” That’s why I need a fake ass. Those ones you can get molded? A replica. Second best thing to the real thing. So people can touch that.

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Well the ass is amazing. It is so nice it almost doesn’t make sense. That’s how you stop the fighting in Syria as I see it. Show them a video of your ass and that will end it. Who would want to keep fighting when they could look at your ass instead?
I like that. “Stop war with Lexi Love’s ass.”

It works.
A lot of wars were started because of women. Why can’t a woman stop one?

See? World peace through ass. We can do this.
We can! I’m in.

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So for any poor fools who have never laid eyes on the majesty of your derriere, can you describe it in a couple words or less?
Round. Firm. Bodacious. Fat-bottomed. Nice and juicy. I enjoy it. It’s great to have something nice and cushy to sit on. Although it gets a little odd when I’m at the gym and people want to stand behind me when I get on a machine.

I can imagine that when you’re in the gym, there is no one who is not behind you.
What’s funny is they don’t seem to realize that I can see them in the mirror checking out my ass. I just tell them I’m glad I provide inspiration for their workout.

How do you maintain it? Like a thousand squats a day?
It never used to be hard to maintain, but it is now. I run. And I walk around in heels all day and that will keep your ass very nice and high and tight. The walking does it. I’ve lived in Boston and San Francisco and New York; cities where you tend to walk places instead of taking a car. Also, living in a five story building helps.

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How did you get into porn?
When I was 19, my friends dared me to pose naked for High Society magazine, and I did, and I got published. And they asked me to come to LA and do porn, but I was going to school in Boston and dating someone and I just said no. Then later, I moved to San Francisco and started dating someone who was doing porn–and that’s always an interesting conversation when you start dating someone. So one day he was filming and the actress didn’t show up and they asked me if I wanted to do a scene with him. So I figured it pays quite well, I’m already having sex with him, and — at least at the time — you had to go to a DVD store to actually get these movies. So I did it.

Since then, how many films have you done?
Around 600. But the piracy is a big problem. I haven’t filmed in about three years because of it. My ass doesn’t get around as much any more because everybody’s been pirating it. But it’s all good. I have a lot of never-before-seen footage of my ass that I’m going to slowly start releasing in the fall.

What article of clothing would you say best accentuates your ass?
I have this little, form-fitting black dress that has an extra ring of fabric that goes right under my butt cheeks pretty much, so when I wear it, it gives me two really nice lady lumps on the back.

What’s the strangest fetish you’ve ever encountered involving your ass?
The strangest thing I’ve ever been asked to do was to stick golf balls into my ass and then pop them out. And my biggest concern was not being able to retrieve them. I asked if the golf balls had string on them and he said, “no,” so I had to explain that my ass really likes to eat things and I’d be afraid that if I put something in there that didn’t have a string or some way to get them out, they may not come out, and I’d end up spending the day in the emergency room.

All in a day’s work!
Right? Oddly enough, I ended up doing a shoot called “Milk Nymphos” for the same person who wanted the golf balls, and for this film they wanted to stuff milk in my ass. But I’m vegan, so I said, “I’m not fucking putting milk in my ass. You’ve got to find vegan milk or something different.” So they went to the store and got some soy milk and came back and realized that the soy milk they got was vanilla flavored and had a brown color to it and wouldn’t work, so they went back and got rice milk and that wouldn’t work so they went back to the store again. So my work day consisted of sitting around waiting while someone got the right kind of milk substitute to put in my ass so I could squirt it out of my ass into someone’s face. Oh, and I was dressed as a kitty cat the whole time.

That actually sounds pretty phenomenal.
Definitely something you write home to mom about. “Guess what I did today?”

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In your experience, who makes a better facesitting victim: a man or a woman?
I’d say a man. And that’s only because I haven’t met too many women who like having their faces smothered by ass. Maybe I’m not hanging out with the right people. I have done a lot of girl-on-girl films but there’s almost always a penis involved.

When you were in the industry, did you date other porn stars?
The guy I was dating when I got into porn, we got married. We eventually got divorced, but I was with him pretty much the whole time I was in the industry. And so we had a pretty normal sex life. On set, I was this crazy ass-smothering naughty girl. But then I’d go home, make dinner, do the laundry, hang out with my husband.

Since he was also working in porn that must have made for some awesome “how was your day today?” conversations.
It made it tough. We had rules and the primary one was, “If the camera isn’t rolling, it doesn’t need to be happening.” There were actually a lot of people who didn’t want to work with me because of that. Once the cameras were off, I’d be like, “You can take your penis out of me now.” I was a bit of a downer when it came to stuff like that, but that’s how it was. I had a face to sit on at home.

I can’t imagine it’s tough for a porn star to find dates.
It may not be tough but it’s different. When I’m working and you meet someone on a set, you ask the same questions: What do you like, what can I do to you, what can’t I do to you, this is what you can and can’t do to me? Let me see your tests, your ID. That’s the run down. You just meet somebody and then you’re on their face. After a while, you know everybody in the industry. Interestingly, I just had my first real-life one night stand a couple months ago, and afterward I was thinking, “Well, I guess I’ve kinda done this before on set.” Only this time, I got to pick the person.

For the purpose of–well, let’s call it research–for this interview, I watched a lot of your facesitting films and they are pretty amazing. Especially the ones with you and another woman grinding a guy’s face between your ass. I’ve always said when it’s time for me to die, that’s how I want to go.
I like doing those films, and it’s kinda fun being the woman on the other side of the face. They’d tell me, “You have to sit on this guy’s face and tell him he can’t breathe and call him a little sissy bitch and smother him with your ass.” I sometimes couldn’t believe I’d be getting paid for it.

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So tell me about Uncle Don’s Exotic Interludes, which is a game you’re involved with.
It’s a board game and the best way to describe it is strip poker meets Monopoly meets sex education meets truth or dare.

I’m in.
::Laughs:: It’s a lot of fun. It’s really cute and really fun. And it comes with safety cards so if you don’t want to get naked, you don’t have to.

Is there really an “Uncle Don”?
Yes! He’s the guy who invented the game. And everybody really calls him Uncle Don. Even though I told him that when you’re having sex, the last thing you want to be thinking about is your uncle. That’s kinda creepy.

Agreed, but please tell me more.
I used to be the spokesperson for the game, but when I got out of the industry and went back to school, I got away from it. But after a while, I think my fans who were following me on Twitter or Facebook got tired of hearing me talking about school and quoting Business Insider so I started hinting that I might come back and maybe do some photo shoots or some cam shows. As soon as Uncle Don heard this, he contacted me and said, “Are you really coming back to porn, because I haven’t done anything with the game since you left.” So I picked up the game again and started looking at it and said, “If I’m gonna do something with this, we gotta revamp it,” So we hired some people to redo the website and rewrite the directions to make it a little more fun. Then we flew to LA and shot a whole bunch of promos for it with people like Ron Jeremy and Tasha Reign and Aubrey Addams and Britney Amber. And as I said, it really is a lot of fun. I’ve done a lot of user testing with it, and I’ve played it at parties with all types of people, from doctors and lawyers to Ivy Leaguers and stem-cell researchers, and everyone loves it.

I must say, it is a lot like a much more enjoyable, racier version of Monopoly. And I like the fact that if, for example, you can’t pay your rent, you can “negotiate” with the person you owe.
Yes. You can pay your rent in blowjobs if everyone’s consenting. We do say that if it breaks out into sex or an orgy, the game doesn’t have to end, you can come back to it. If you decide to have sex on the board and the pieces get moved around, that’s alright.

Also, it seems like another excellent way to get your face sat on, which I like.
You can definitely get your face sat on playing this game. You could have massive ass in your face. You could have more than one ass in your face. If you were playing with a group of women and you wanted all of them to put their asses in your face, you could have that, too.

In other words, you’ve taken the contents of my brain and somehow turned it into a game.
Apparently, yes.

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Alright, I’ll finish off with some rapid-fire ass questions. What is the best compliment you’ve ever received on your ass?
“Is that real?” yes, I didn’t buy it. It’s mine. I grew this.

Thong or boyshorts?
Um. Normally, g-strings because when I wear a thong my ass freakin’ eats it all and I end up with the weirdest wedgies. As for boyshorts, if I’m hanging around the house or wearing a dress I’ll wear them. But if I’m wearing pants they go right up the cheeks and get eaten. And then I’m constantly picking my ass and people are staring and I have to say, “Look, you don’t understand, my ass is eating my underwear.”

Tight jeans or spandex?
That’s a tough question. If it’s really fucking cold out, tight jeans. But in the fall, I like to wear leggings with the big boots.

If people want to see more of your ass, where can they go?
Depends on what you want to see. If you just want to watch me fuck, it’s lexilove.com. If you want to actually kind of get to know my quirky side — and I can be a little strange and out there — you can follow me on Twitter or Facebook or YouTube. And if you want to check out my game, you can go to exoticinterludes.com. I also have a site called lexilovescloset.com that has some other things people may like.

Can you give us one example, outside of your line of work, where you used your ass to tease the ever-loving fuck out of someone?
This isn’t really teasing, but it’s funny. I use my ass to open doors. In New York City, I try not to touch a lot of things, so I’m always using my ass to open doors when I’m walking into stores or out of the subway. So if someone’s coming the other way, all they see is my ass pressed against the glass door. It gets a lot of stares.

Well, there’s an argument for using the New York subways. You might see Lexi Love’s ass open doors.
Literally!

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