Sex With Robots Probably Going to Start Happening Soon


As a young, impressionable lad watching the Star Wars movies, I remember being quite taken with the droids. I also remember asking myself that timeless question, “When will there be female robots that I can have sex with?”

Turns out we may not be too far off. That branch of science that seems to concern itself with getting people off and has already given us the fake plastic vagina and the jerk-off machine is finally giving us humanoid robots that are very screwable.

This is good news, because ever since I’d heard that science was building robots for use in the health care industry–to help elderly and incapacitated patients–I was wondering when someone would cut through all this bullshit and just give us robots that can fuck.

In fact, you can get one today. On the True Companion website, a 5’7″, 60 pound female robot named Roxxxy who is always in the mood can be had for about $9,000. Because the ladies need lovin’ too, it also comes in a male version named Rocky.

But would people really want to have sex with robots? Or shack up with one in a real adult sex community? Apparently so. A Huffington Post poll from earlier this year revealed that one in eleven people in the US said they they’d be willing to have sex with a robot.

As for me, I’m not so sure. Sex with me already seems to reduce women to a sort of catatonic, robotic state (which is probably just a byproduct of teleporting their minds a million miles away from my naked body), so I guess it would feel pretty normal.

I’ll put it this way: If they look like Sean Young or Darryl Hannah in Blade Runner, I’m all in. If they look like R2-D2, I may need a few drinks first. And some assurance that my penis isn’t going to be crushed by gears.

Leave a Reply