The Casual Friday Survival Guide

Today is Friday, which is casual day at my place of employ.

This means that, even as I type these words, pretty much every woman from 18 to 52 who works in our financial division is wedging herself into low-slung, too-tight jeans. This is not a day for me to be making decisions that could, y’know, affect the fate of our organization or my position within it. That’s what Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday are for. Today, I just slip it into neutral, and soak it all in.

As you all know, Casual Friday is something of a holy day of obligation for me. It’s the one day I actually look forward to coming in the office and I let very little stand in my way. I’ve ignored sinus infections, 103 degree fevers, blizzards and vampire attacks to ensure my presence.

The trick to getting the full show on this magical day is surprisingly simple: Slide a manilla folder under your arm. That’s your “hall pass,” so to speak, to every square foot of the building. Because as you wander aimlessly through the office, soaking in all of the denim and vaccuum-packed lycra wonder, your fellow workers will always assume you’re transporting something of grave importance. Is it a memo from ownership? A horrifying new directive from HR? A slab of pink slips? So long as you’ve got that manilla folder, you’ll keep ’em guessing. And, hopefully, ignoring the fact that your eyes are burning holes in every female derriere that crosses into your field of vision.

This is particularly critical to getting into the IT wing, where many a cute young lass waits. And very likely bent over a server. Bonus!

Please join me in a quick salute to Casual Day. And if you’re a woman showing off everything you’ve got for the good of employee engagement, me and my folder applaud you.

1 Comment

  1. Ariel

    October 26, 2012 at 10:28 am

    are you sure he’s not looking at two lamps?
    http://www.achristmasstoryhouse.com/images/leglamp/leglamp12.jpg

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