What Not to Do After a Meeting

Note to Self, #3,765-B: The next time you’re in a meeting in the shared conference room in the farthest corner of the building and the unbelievably hot new admin girl is in attendance, be sure to practice restraint.

Don’t stare too long as she works her pen in her mouth. Don’t let your mind wander as you see the tips of her well-manicured fingers slowly run up and down the side of her iPhone. And, specifically, at the end of said meeting, don’t linger around, flipping through the papers in your hand, until said hot new admin girl and everybody else shuffles out the door.

And then don’t casually walk to the door just to make sure they’ve all really headed off down the hall.

And then, in the name of all that is holy, don’t — just don’t — drop to your knees in front of the chair the hot new admin girl was sitting in and bury your face in the seat.

Not because it’s kinda freaky, but because that’s the precise moment someone will walk into the room.

And, not for nothing, they won’t buy your “Oh, there’s my pen” routine.

(Not that this actually happened to me, mind you. I’m just sayin’.)

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